Tag: Chronic Pain

Hyssop – Don’t Fear the Pain

 I was wondering, Ed, why of all the herbal painkillers, Jesus was given Hyssop and vinegar (or sour wine) when on the cross. It seemed to me to be hardly something given to someone in pain who was expected to die.

Yet again, it’s an instance of a herb being used that is not for the dead or dying at all, like aloes – a wound healer- in which they wrapped his dead body. It’s the equivalent of packing a dead body in Neosporin/Bacitracin/Polyspirin. How ridiculous is that? They so expected him to come back into his body.

But the Hyssop, Ed, mystified me because it is a BITTER herb, a liver cleanser, not exactly a painkiller. It seemed like they were torturing him even more giving him that.

Anyhow Ed, recently I went through some days when suppressed memories of traumatic times I’ve been through arose and on instinct I decided to have Hyssop tea everyday.

On day one, Ed, the bitterness was a shock. It is REALLY bitter. But on day two, I wanted it, and had three cups in a row.

To my surprise, Ed, I found that Hyssop was vibing with, or vibrating the same as pain spots in my body, those cells holding pain. I’m not talking about physical pain, Ed. I’m talking about the residue in the body of emotional and energetic destruction; The sort that literally pulverizes the energy field into splinters.

Somehow, Ed, Hyssop makes it possible to feel those without fainting away at the pain, or escaping by distracting oneself.

It inspires strength to face mind blowing pain, Ed.

I never knew this before and now I have in my mind the idea of a whole different kind of painkiller. The sort that inspires you to feel the pain instead of turning away. That’s the best sort of painkiller according to me, because you leave nothing to deal with later. You fully experience what you’re experiencing and process it too. It’s scary but in hindsight it’s the best way. Continue reading

How to Find and Hold our Natural Frequency; Frequency Stabilizer Herbs, Emotional Fog & Alternate Identities

The importance of one central frequency; How different parts of us start carrying different frequencies; How to find our base natural frequency, How to unite our system into our base frequency; How to maintain our base frequency; Emotional Fog; Frequency Stabilizing Herbs; Alter identities and methods to Remind ourselves of our base frequency incl. urine and sexual fluids

Dear Ed,

In recent times I’ve been contacted more and more by people asking me which herbs to use for a certain medical diagnosis but actually describing what I would simply call metabolic imbalance or an unstable frequency.

Every thing of our body works fine when we have one stable frequency at which all our cells are vibrating.

It’s like every cell is a radio and they all need to be tuned in to one radio station – our heart which sets the frequency for the body – and they’ll all be hearing the same central command and everything will work smooth in the body.

What we have though these days, is various parts of the body falling out of tune with our natural frequency.

Our frequency is impacted by everything that happens to us, that we experience. From the food we eat, to the emotional ups and downs we experience.

We’re built to weather all extremes. Our bodies can vibrate at very high and very low frequencies without a problem.

The problem arises when some parts of us are not able to keep up with the others. This is usually because they’re bogged down doing extra work – such as digesting complex unnatural food, dealing with poisons and so on.

Over time, if the situation continues, there are various parts of us simply unable to keep up and settle into their independent frequency that’s not exactly in tune with the rest of the body.

Long term liver overload for example – caused by eating factory made sauces, mayonnaise, fats, and other “amalgamated” foods and medicines – has the liver in a different frequency from the rest of the body as it becomes tired and sluggish. This is one major cause of skin problems, weight problems, hair loss and so on.

Too much fake sugar (sucrose/ glucose/ factory sugar) makes the pancreas get tired and fall into its own frequency causing diabetes and other such conditions.

ALL autoimmune problems are caused by various parts of us going into different frequencies starting the Me versus Me syndrome.

So you see, Ed, if we can stabilize our frequency, unite our body up into one frequency , we’re dealing one fell swoop to so many different problems, possibly ALL of them.

There was this guy I met in a train, Ed.

I know how that sounds these days. Like it was a borderline romantic encounter. But it was not. So this guy was in his twenties and he had very long legs. I mean, his body proportions were different from others around him. He had a resemblance to the family he was traveling with, in his face, but his body was different.

I couldn’t contain my curiosity and broke my rule of never speaking to anyone while traveling. These were days before I had a child and I used to take such risks once in a while.

So I asked the guy’s mother who was sitting somewhat closer to me, about him. I said,
“His legs are so long. Different from the other brothers….”
She (blushing), “Yes….”
On my still looking curious, she half whispered to me, “When he was a baby we took him to a mountain place, my relative’s village for six months. In those few months his bones began to grow long. When we returned it continued.”
“But,” she said, “He’s different from the others in other ways as well. He always has behaved like he’s from that mountain place, not like where we live. He never gets involved in fights and arguments with others, doesn’t make many friends… he’s different altogether. He’s a different…. frequency.”

I liked that Ed, that she used that word “frequency”. Because it shows that people everywhere, just common people understand that.

The interesting thing for me was that in babyhood the boy got into a frequency in the mountains, perhaps one that suited his soul and in his late twenties was still carrying it and it had caused his body to develop differently from his family and surrounding others. I really liked that. We all ought to carry and hold our own soul frequency in our lives and we’ll be healthy and achieve our goals that way.

That incident set me off subconsciously looking into how to find our own frequency and hold it. Here are some of my findings.

1) How to find natural frequency after long term disruption.

It really is simple, Ed. We find our natural frequency in rest, whether that’s deep sleep rest or waking rest. Those who succeed in the battles of their lives have this in common. They know how to get their rest despite the situation.

Some people never find rest, no matter how good or bad things are going. This is usually because of unreleased trauma.

I have been writing for about 14 years now about the importance of releasing suppressed trauma and I get people emailing me saying, “How long do I have to do this? I keep finding more and more buried trauma.”

You just have to keep doing it because when you face your trauma, you’re loving your self, respecting your self. It’s like you’re your own child. Would you ignore a pain or hurt your child was carrying, while trying to get around surviving? You would want to look at the wound, right? However bad it was? You’d want to do whatever you could to heal it.

If your child had a million wounds, you would look at the million of them, and do whatever you could to soothe each. You wouldn’t say, “Sorry that’s too many wounds.”

We need to treat ourselves like our own child. It could be a long process but it gets more and more rewarding as we begin to actually see through the emotional fog of our lives.

Emotional fog keeps our nervous frequency unstable.

Emotional clarity helps us maintain a stable nervous frequency that in turn supports the body in every aspect of healing.

I asked my Granddad about it once.

Me – Why do I always feel emotionally confused and restless?
Granddad – You believe a whole lot of lies and from time to time you get tired of carrying them.
Me – I’ve been told so many lies…. But why do they trouble me emotionally?
Granddad – Because you’ve really BELIEVED them and been emotionally manipulated by them.
Me – But I’ve believed everything… all kinds of things.
Granddad – Alright. So you’ve been a fool.
Me – I don’t see how it’s going to help me, you saying I’ve been a fool.
Granddad – You seem really incensed that I’ve called you a fool. It’s as if you didn’t know it before.
Me – Well, if you must know, I don’t consider myself a fool. I’ve thought things out a lot and if I’ve believed lies it’s only because there were people and books I trusted.
Granddad – You were a fool to trust them.
Me – Yes but I was a CHILD!!. Kids don’t even DREAM that there’s a reason not to trust anyone.
Granddad – Were you a fool or a child? Make up your mind.
Granddad – So you became a fool only later – as a teenager perhaps?
Me. I was still a child then and you know it.
Granddad – So when did you stop being a child?
Me – Never. Now that you ask.
Granddad – So you have a child’s emotions then?
Me – I suppose.
Granddad – That means you like candy and fluffy soft things?
Me – Yes.
Granddad – So the majority of the lies you believed came dressed as candy and fluffy soft things?
Me – Yes.
Granddad – So if you cleared the candy and fluffy soft things out, a large part of the lies would go?
Me. I suppose. You’re talking about things that comforted me, aren’t you? Like romantic ideas about life?
Granddad – I’m talking about those, but not the ones that came from your heart. Those that others gave you.
Me – My own romantic ideas are true?
Granddad – They surely are.
Me – But romantic ideas given to me by others are not.
Granddad – Mostly not. Either they love you really, or not. Selling you comforting dreams is giving you candy and a fluffy toy.
Me – Makes me think…. Those people who gave me fluffy toys but never really actually equipped me with anything true to deal with my problems.
Granddad – When you get used to the candy and fluffy toys way of thinking you get emotionally fogged. You begin to see candy and fluffy toys as a way of addressing problems, instead of actually solving them. It is a poisonous way of life and it will accumulate poisons in the body as well.
Me – Oh my God! You’re so right.

So you see, one of the main causes of Emotional Fog in our lives is the candy and fluffy toy mindset we could have developed through our lives, learning to comfort ourselves instead of facing problems directly and actually solving them.

Our nervous frequency is sensitive to our subconscious mind and our primal energy field. These are not fooled by fake and surface comfort. They keep our psyche and body down and pull us back down every time we trip for a day or two or more on a candy/ fluff idea.

So to find our natural frequency we need to face our truths, honor the dreams from our soul – not the ones sold to us by others that distracted us from reality.

2) Uniting the body into one frequency

This would happen automatically when we find our reality, but the reason it’s a topic here is because Ed, I learned some things that can greatly help. Herbs Ie. My angels as always.

What happens when we’ve been living in parts – ie. our base body frequency different from our tripping frequency (you heard it first from me, Ed, “tripping frequency”) is, we have mood swings and hormonal swings that can be devastating.

Treating the body for these tends to also help support us in coming off the tripping frequency and staying at a normal frequency for longer and longer periods at a time.

When I was growing up, there was a member of the foster family who was helplessly dependent on tripping. He’d had great dreams for his future but blown it all doing something – I never found out what – it must’ve been some sort of crime. The sort that even if you escaped from its legal consequences, dogs you down. It had him down for good anyhow. Every single day he would only spark up after having something to help him keep tripping.

A person who wants to escape reality can do so by programming their self to trip after having a cup of tea, if that’s all they can get. This person however did it with different sorts of alcohol and then additives to it.

I watched, Ed, over three decades how the guy destroyed his body and life. Then I saw his son do the exact same thing.

People would talk about them. “What’s wrong with him? He’s so talented, so popular…. Why can’t he stop drinking (etc)?” I used to wonder too.

Anyway why I’m telling you about this, Ed, is because I was exposed to that environment in which people escaped reality and I thought it was the way to go too. Those who couldn’t afford to drink, tripped on other things… Mine was a Mother Teresa complex. So long as I was helping someone else, I’d ignore my own problems and get enough of a rush to keep me going.

Unlike the guy and his son (both dead now) I got a lot of help from herbs.

Herbs really rescue people, Ed, every day for real. It’s why I do what I do, because herbs are living beings, aspects of God, and they truly help people. Those who escape reality by using a herb, that herb gently navigates them back to reality. It’s one reason why people “move on” from marijuana or cannabis. They start having “bad trips”. Ie. the herb begins to reveal their reality instead of taking them away from it.

Datura is one bad ass angel that way. I know people terrified at the name of Datura. That herb will fish out the nastiest stinkiest parts of a person’s consciousness with great enthusiasm and make a full-on modern art gut and intestine display.

But again, I digress.

What has helped me so much is herbs that help maintain hormonal calm so that I slowly normalized from the extreme highs and lows I used to go through when I was on my Mother Teresa complex drug.

The same herbs work for both men and women, because it’s simply about normalizing frequency. Male bodies use the flower’s suggestion in a male way, and female bodies in a female way.

These frequency normalizing herbs are:

Pulsatilla, Cactus Grandiflora, Borage, Damiana, Passionflower, Yerba Mate, Poppy, Dandelion and St. John’s Wort.
(There are others, but really, it’s a very rare person for who one of these wouldn’t work.)

There are spices right in people’s houses and available in supermarkets that also help normalize hormonal swings. Fennel, Fenugreek, Cinnamon, Khus or Poppy Seed, Star of Anise… All these are hormonal swing balancers.

They don’t work as well when taken in food where they’re drowned out by other things, but gentle teas where you can feel them individually are very helpful.

Special Honorable MentionMonotropa Uniflora or Ghostpipes – One Stop Treatment for Anxiety, helps hormonal levels swinging because of anxiety to stabilize.

When you take a herbal treatment, or a tea, you are demonstrating your soul, your love and care for yourself. That in itself is strengthening and empowering.

If you have you on your side, you’ll feel so much more confident in facing your problems, rather than escaping.

3) How to hold frequency stable

Our frequency stays stable, Ed, if we maintain a stable sense of identity.

I read a book recently. It’s called “Landon’s Cry”. In it a boy develops what they call an “alter” or alternative identity called “Wolf” in order to deal with the abuse he’s put through. He was a naturally timid boy. But Wolf was an aggressive, fighting back sort. He dealt with his trauma by being Landon sometimes and Wolf other times.
It’s a survival mechanism we all have, to get us through extreme situations.

As an adult, Landon sort of reunited his two “alters”.

A lot of people, in our times, Ed, have to develop alternate personalities to get through life, but unlike Landon, we’re not aware of it and every time we shift personalities, our base frequency shifts suddenly too.

This is why some people who seem so sorted and successful sometimes suddenly present with life threatening conditions that could only have developed over a long time of unstable disrupting frequency shifts.


These shifts between alternate identities, take a huge toll on the body and psyche because whatever work was being done in one frequency – say digestion, processing nutrition, processing out poisons and such, all get stalled when the alternate identity with its frequency takes over. So all those poisons are still there hanging about the body, causing all manner of problems, the food got only half digested and processed, and all those thoughts we were thinking, hang midway instead of leading us on to action.

On so many levels we are held back by these frequency shifts.

Children like me who were dis-identified, ie. given a false identity through fostering/ adoption never can settle down till we find out our true natural identities and accept ourselves. This is simply because our bodies and souls’ natural frequency is the one associated with our natural birth identity.

We don’t have identity options, Ed. What our body responds to, our actual birth identity is our natural frequency for this life.

Accepting it and living with it, greatly helps normalize hormonal levels and frequency. The healing is powerful and tangible. People will tear up their lives to find their true identity because their soul knows it’s the only way.

It’s not only those who need to find their birth identity that need to come into their own, and there are many practices and methods for this.

One practice is affirmations. Reminding your self through the day, in words, who you are. Who you really are.

You set reminders for every few hours, or even every waking hour if you want.

And when the reminder comes up, you ask yourself, “Who am I?” And you answer that. Say it out loud. Go to the bathroom and whisper it if you’re in company. See if you believe yourself. Let yourself say whatever you feel is true about you.

Initially you’ll say surface stuff like – This is my name, I live here. I support this sports team.

Initially you might not like your answers.

Slowly you’ll start getting deeper and closer to your soul identity. Just keep saying your true identity out loud to yourself.

Another way to keep your frequency stable – especially for those with extreme hormonal fluctuations and energy swings – is the infamous urine therapy.

Wow, Ed, I typed #urinetherapy into the twitter app the other day and got the shock of my life. Such virulent tweets against the practice!

Having grown up partially wild and with my Granddad who grew up nearly all wild in the Hebrides islands and then spent his married life in a jungle in India, seeing animals taking back their own urine and sexual fluids is a normal thing. When animals sense even their environment disturbed, such as by the cutting down of trees, the arrival of a new predator in the area, or a really major atmospheric disturbance coming on, they will stimulate themselves and drink back their urine/ sexual fluids to keep their frequency stable.

The water of our bodies carries our energy patterns – both our primal one and the one we’re in in the moment. When we come in touch with our own water, our body recognizes our primal energy pattern and immediately vibrates to it. This immediately stabilizes our frequency.

Perspiring, and peeing are our first physiological responses to being pverwhelmed, simply because our own fluid coming in contact with our skin has an immediate frequency balancing effect. People often find themselves more focused after they have broken into a sweat.

When a person’s urine or sexual fluids are full of pharma drugs and false salts from processed food, they are STILL carrying a person’s home frequency and taken in a small amount – say a few drops – powerful in reminding the body of its own frequency.

What’s really powerful though, is if a person gets off drugs, eats food cooked at home, with as few processed bits as possible. Ie. without using factory made flavoring, sauces; And then “loops” their urine. Through the day, drink back maybe a cup or more. This brings the body’s frequency down from the tripping frequencies and keeps it stable. No matter which frequency your body goes through through the day the calm constant reminder of your base frequency keeps stabilizing the body and psyche.

It’s not easy emotionally. Especially, if you’re used to being in different frequencies long term.  But there are so many benefits – I wrote a book about it recently. First Water – The use of Urine and Sexual Fluids as Medicine.

Another get around for those on drugs etc, is to do a fast for about 12-24 hours, and collect urine taken at the end of the fast. The urine without the drugs and salts. Put that in a bottle and take drops/ swigs of it, a few times a day till you can do the fast again. You’ll find yourself slowly gravitating towards only eating the things that don’t make your urine unpalatable.

It’s possibly the greatest aid to weight loss ever as a natural appetite suppressant, diabetes ( a major frequency disruption), sexual energy balance, and so much more.

When combined with herbal medicine, it becomes such a powerful aid in a person’s life, it’s beyond amazing.

Some Related Information:

Double Energy Field & Energy Rehabilitation

Energy Field Assault Recovery and Building Resistance with Herbs

Sea Salt and Bio-rhythm Recovery after Shock, Trauma

Splintered Energy Body , Herbs for Re-connection ; Recovery

Nervous Frequency Stability; Herbs, Holistic Attitude Continue reading

Herbs for Nerve Repair, Nerve Blow out, Numb Nerve Endings

Why nerve repair is so important; Herbs and Charcoal for Nerve Repair; Herbs for external nerve ending healing; Beautiful painting of girl and dog by Ilya Repin Continue reading

Mental Projections of False Body Image and Identity

Dear Ed,

A topic very close to my heart, is the effects of trauma on body image. One of the first articles I wrote that was on the internet (unfortunately lost now) was titled “Phantom Body”.

I wrote to you about it last year as well: Phantom Energy Body; Upper-Lower Body Disconnection

Our mind is constantly projecting an image of our bodies on us,

influencing our very real energy field to behave differently from its own nature. Our body shifts out of alignment because of the false image and behaves in a way as to support the false image.

For example, if someone believes in their head that they’re fat, that’s a constant suggestion to their energy field to skew and pull the shape of body into a “fat” shape. Our soul will resist the lie, often causing backswings to that, but the result of that conflict is tiredness and feeling an internal war going on.

I have experienced myself and seen on many occasions, people having a whole double or phantom energy body, purely mentally projected but causing the body to circulate blood to certain areas erratically, and disturbing the alignment of the body. It shows psychologically in what is called Bipolar Affective Disorder, Manic depression and so on.

In my childhood, Ed, before I reached the 10th grade, I was shifted across five schools in three different states. Because of that, I got to see and study different children’s energy fields in very different climate zones and have a sort of outsider’s perspective.

Something very interesting I noticed was that children tended to look like an identity or character profile imposed by a teacher and others around.

For example, a child constantly being projected on as being from a certain community, began to look more and more like from that community/ ethnic group. To my surprise I found out months later that that child wasn’t actually of that community at all, but her name had been misspelled in kindergarten giving rise to that idea. No one had thought of correcting the mistake at all! The child was physically looking like a community she had no connection to, because of it!!

This was in the 5th grade and the child was so used to it that she didn’t seem to think it even strange. She was quite pretty, but carried herself in a sort of crushed way, lessening her height. She was always fidgeting and uncomfortable. She was fair skinned but had developed large patches of thick dark layers of what looked like coagulated blood under the skin, giving the impression that she was dark. This made her actually look, at first glance, like she was from the community being projected on her.

It really amazed me, as even back then I could see that her very physical features had begun to resemble that community with which she had no connection at all!

I began to notice that as I went from school to school. How children carried themselves and gave an impression of something that to my eye, as someone who hadn’t known them before that year, was something false.

For example, a child who was in the top end of the class’s best performers, still carried herself and considered herself a loser, in the 8th grade. This girl could’ve been so sparkly, but was carrying this false projection from so far back. When I asked her why she didn’t take part in an aerobics display, she said that she couldn’t because she didn’t do the movements right. I asked why not. She said that her hands and legs don’t align right and it looked weird. I had a look and they did align right, but she was CARRYING them wrong, as if there was something wrong with them. I asked her why she did that and she said that when she was in kindergarten, the teacher had called her parents to the school and told them she couldn’t put their child in the sport’s day display because her hands and legs were not aligned right.

All those years later when there was no problem, when she’d grown out of that childhood awkward growth phase she was still carrying herself – her knees turned in, her elbows looking a bit disjointed… when there was no reason whatsoever other than habit and projection.

I could go on and on Ed.

Something from my own life – Because I was brought up in a family with no connection to my own genetics (I was unaware of my birth identity till I was 23), I was always a misfit. My body behaved differently from theirs. For example my skin gets sunburned very easily – something alien to a family genetically programmed to the tropics. My digestive system reacts violently to spicy food and I’ve never been able to eat traditional indian food comfortably as a result.

So my body was very drastically different. Yet, Ed, in my childhood and beyond, I’d develop what someone called “sympathy illness” but which I later realized were me projecting a false identity on myself. One incident I remember was when many of the family were talking about how they all had tooth swellings at a particular age. Before that day I’d never had a problem with a tooth in my life. But the very next day my cheek was swollen mysteriously with what wasn’t even a tooth infection but looked like one. I was even sort of aware of what was going on. That I’d projected it on myself.

In reality Ed, we tend to project an image of how our bodies “ought to” look on ourselves based on various social cues, the psychic suggestion of those we look up to and so on. This usually results in problems for us, because our energy then isn’t flowing according to our own needs.

There are severe debilitating problems caused because of this.

It’s a powerful sort of healing, when we connect to our own soul identity, our own truth. The body physically changes and many conditions previously unresponsive to treatment, disappear.

There was a time I rented a room in the basement of a family. That cultural group suppressed women (while making every show of not doing so) and to this day I can recognize women of that ethnic group and those around them and hanging out with them, by their hunched shoulders. I developed the habit as well when I was there, without realizing it.

I later became conscious of it but continued because the one time I straightened up, I was in a bus stand and men around immediately began to notice me and give me the eye like I was asking for attention. For my safety I hunched back. It was the moment I decided to leave there as soon as I could.

Our basic upright posture, where energy flows from the earth beneath to the crown of our heads and back; this is our birthright. The health and beauty and wellness and intelligence that comes from it, move us towards our destiny and the fulfillment of our life purpose. Continue reading

How to Holistically Stabilize Energy Levels – Energy Flow from Consciousness to Body

Me in 2004, still trying to be the life of the party.

My investigation into why healed conditions kept returning; The body’s allegiance to the consciousness; Imposing mental constructs on our experience; Reactive emotions versus deep emotional state; The manifestation zone – Gender and Sexuality; Energy flow from consciousness to body; How to stabilize body temperature  

Dear Ed,

This is about one very simple principle of holistic healing that took me very long to learn.

There’s this frustrating thing, where when you look into why an allergy flared up again out the blue, why an infection struck again, why a condition came back after going away for a while; all the information you get is, “Stress can cause this.”

Stress is such a generic word, Ed, and most people are living under stress 24 x 7 for years and years. OK, I understand there’s everyday stress and there’s worse than that, stress, but I just find it frustrating and unfair, to tell someone that stress caused the problem.

What’s the use of medicine really if one bad day can cause it to go defunct?

I first started investigating this when I was a teenager. I had (and have) faith in prayer, Ed. Many times in my life, I had no access to medicines or herbs and had a debilitating problem, I’ve prayed and been healed. I’ve prayed for others and they’ve been healed. I was somewhat famous in church circles when I was a teenager for that.

My problem was when the problem would come back after a few days. If God had healed the person, why did the problem come back? WHY WHY WHY. It burned me and tested my faith in everything.

I thought – Maybe prayer healing is just a temporary thing for emergency help. God has made herbs and medicines and healing therapies so that we go through the process of healing. That process of healing is important because as we heal our bodies, we heal our consciousness and our lives change. That life change is the reason we fell ill in the first place.

It is all indeed so true, Ed. The healing process is important.

I could just pick anyone off the street and ask them about their life and they’d tell me at some point that finding healing for a health condition they had, led to something that led to something that led to something now an indispensable part of their lives. So, that healing process is important.

So I made peace with that.

Granddad rubbed it in too. The day I had two heart attacks on the same day, Christmas day 2000, he rewired my energy field manually. I ran up and down the stairs fifteen times without losing breath immediately after. I was ecstatic! I was gushing, “Teach me to do it too.”

Granddad warned me it was temporary. And he taught me something then and later on as well.

The first allegiance of body is to your consciousness.

Whatever you give the body, it will go back to maintaining itself as a mirror of your consciousness, and to support you staying in that consciousness. It is semper fi to your consciousness.

Take me for example. I had severe heartbreak in my childhood and then teenage years. I had 99% put it away from my conscious mind. I really mean 100%. But consciousness doesn’t give one damn for our conscious mind. Sad but true. It’s all about reality for our consciousness or energy field.

If we’re sad deep down, our consciousness is sad, depressed, self isolating, and our body is ever faithful, semper fi, to reflecting that.

No matter which medicine you take, which herb, which yogic practice, which chant you chant, where you go holidaying, how much money you give away, or keep…. It all doesn’t matter. The body will swing back to reflecting your consciousness.

Alright, so when I was 23, I began to wake up and smell the coffee. I had this moment when in one second I realized my life was full of lies. I wasn’t the cheerful life-of-the-party I thought I was. I wasn’t free. But worst of all, I had nothing but unresolved pain in me to give anyone who might love me.

So now I decided I was going to exhume all my pain and face the truth about me and my life. Now I look back, I was like a million miles away from even imagining what I’d have to look at. I had been living with such illusions.

But thank God for the spirit in us that makes us push for healing without being aware of the mountain we’re under. 😉 If we told kindergarten kids that they’d have to learn calculus one day to pass out of school, they’d toss their bag and lunchbag and everything and say, “NO WAY I’M EVEN STARTING ON THAT PATH.” (Note – This does not mean I support the existence of calculus in any way. I’m just saying.)

But I started out to exhume my suppressed emotions. I actually thought I’d be done by the weekend. That was 2003. haahahahahaha

Anyway, so the thing is, you have to change your basic attitude to life, and that takes time.

There’s no use emptying your cupboard every weekend and rearranging everything, until you change your habit of tossing things in or pulling everything out to find one thing, and then stuffing everything back in higgledy piggledy because you’re in a hurry.

It’s a horrific thing for a mentally intelligent person such as myself (hmm huh) to change my attitude to being emotionally aware in the moment. I was more of a constantly mental person who “Tapped into emotions” for a “creative inspiration” while writing “inspirational posts” for my blog.

I had a blog in those days. It was called “The Secret Garden”. I named it after my childhood favorite book. But most others thought it was a place where I’d write about my sexual fantasies. Except for one time when I made up a story about how I lost my virginity on a summer day when I was hot and a man twice my age offered me a cold drink – an April fool’s day post that had people commenting even before they read to the end and found out it was an April fool’s day post; I didn’t write anything about sex.

I was writing creative emotional stuff! But everything got taken sexual- perhaps because of the title “The Secret Garden.” I had to close the blog because I couldn’t take the atmosphere anymore. (For your entertainment I will put some posts from then at the bottom of this article.)

But that was my attitude. My emotional exhuming was for a creative process. I thought it was enough.

It took me so long to realize I had to change the way I tossed clothes into the cupboard and removed clothes from the cupboard, on an everyday basis, to keep it neat. That I couldn’t afford two hours every weekend reorganizing it.

Emotionally, that I had to be aware in the moment, not keep it for later, when I’m writing my diary or whatever. That I had to stop imposing mental constructs on life.

Let me give you an example of what I mean by that.

How I was, was, if let’s say I was sitting in a cafe and someone I knew came by, and I said Hi; my previous attitude was a mental one where I’d think, “He’s a friend of friend, and must therefore be a good guy. I must enthusiastically greet him and be happy that I know so many people. So many NICE people.”

So I’d impose this on myself as the person was walking up. I’d be in this mind box of – “This is a friend of whoever, he’s a nice guy”.

In reality I’d probably not know very much about the guy or his friend for that matter. And I was in the mind box – “Do not judge”. I mentally told myself everyone was a wonderful person – if not obviously, then deep down.

It’s all good for a movie, but in reality you get into deep deep trouble with an attitude like that. Where you mentally tell yourself what to experience.

Several people actually teach you to THINK through life, like that. It’s wrong. It causes trouble. It causes us to lose our basic power of emotional experience and recognition of reality to know what’s what and pick up life cues. It creates suppressed emotions and causes health problems that don’t go away until they’re expressed.

Take affirmations for example. It is in fact a great help to tell yourself things, remind yourself, specially in moments of stress, about life truths and such. But past a certain point what it does is make you mentally impose on the situation instead of being emotionally aware.

I had reached a point where I was mentally making myself view every situation through the prism of my affirmations and faith statements. I would realize hours or days later, what actually happened during certain interactions.

As good as those affirmations are, they can never do for us what awareness and experience of the moment can.

So I had to change my attitude, my very way of facing life, that I’d developed to survive my childhood, because it was now hurting me… And I can’t say I’m fully there yet, but I’ve come a long way.

What I did initially though, to stop being so mental, was make compartments of my life. These, these and these situations are where I can be emotionally aware. And these situations are where I CANNOT AFFORD to be emotionally aware.

Those times we think we can’t AFFORD to be emotionally aware, they tend to be the times we need to the most. Because that’s an open channel for abuse right there.

It’s a hard thing to face, Ed. Because many times these are dangerous situations.

I knew this woman who was in a custody battle for her child. I don’t know the details but the thing was, she had to really behave herself, on visits with her child. She had to not be drunk, for one, and not do reckless things like take the child too far away from home so they couldn’t get back by 8pm. That sort of thing.

To tell her to be emotionally aware on those visits instead of mentally controlled, took all of my will and courage and faith. But I felt my instinct saying that her problems could in fact be resolved by being emotionally aware despite the dangers it posed where she could start tripping, get ungrounded, do something reckless that could make her lose even visitation rights.

The general idea is that alcoholics and drug addicts are over-emotional. However, the opposite is also often true. They can actually be terribly emotionally repressed and it could be the root of their problems.

Whatever I recommended, the woman had her choice to make and she really wanted healing. She decided to be emotionally aware and things worked out for her.

Our heart CAN take care of us, in the worst situations, Ed.

This is hard to believe for those people who feel they were betrayed by their heart at some time. Who feel that if they’d not gotten emotional at some point and believed and trusted the wrong people, they wouldn’t have gone through the suffering they did.

Being emotionally aware, instead of mentally controlled, brings unexpected solutions because we’re experiencing and facing reality instead of imagining reality.

A lot of people think being emotionally aware is an option. It isn’t. Not for someone who has a soul anyway. We’re born to experience life, not imagine and pretend. When we experience life, we grow and move on.

Life is the experience of the soul. If we stop emotionally experiencing life, we stop living.

So I started out:
1) Learning that that the process of healing is important, and
2) Experiencing life, ie., being emotionally aware is important.

But now I had a new problem. I was exploding everyday, a few times a day.

I’m emotional about everything, as most humans are in fact. I’m emotional about the vegetables I cook, and cooking makes me emotional. Everything makes me emotional. Cooking, cleaning, waking, sleeping, working, showering, ironing… everything. Everything has memories attached to it.

I was exhausted dealing with my emotions.

Enter my awesome Granddad who told me – There are two sorts of emotions. Reactive emotions and your emotional state. Reactive emotions are the weather. Emotional state is the climate. If you are dressed right for the climate, you don’t have to worry every single day about the weather.

That helped me a lot. It made me look beneath the surface emotions, to the EMOTIONAL STATE – which is in fact our consciousness.

And that’s where, we can begin to actually change our consciousness, our bodies and our lives by emotional awareness.

For me, Ed, it was plain good old deliverance to realize my various emotional states as opposed to reactions. One can react with joy at the sight of a flower, as the deep soul cringes with disgust and terror at the place the flower is, or the person carrying it.

Slowly I realized that these states of consciousness don’t come and go as quickly as the reactive emotions. One can go days, weeks, years in the same state. Hopelessness, Self Doubt, Terror, “Nobody loves me,” “I’m not important,” these are states of consciousness, life attitudes that can last even lifetimes and in healing them is amazing energy release for the body.

When we become aware of our deep emotions, or emotional state, we find we also become aware of our bodies. They’re the same thing.

Which now brings me to why I started writing this to you in the first place.
Because see, there’s a level of consciousness that encompasses both emotional state and physical manifestation or body.

I simply call it the energy field but in fact is that zone where the invisible unmeasurable (in this realm) changes into the visible measurable body.

You know how you can see the colors of the rainbow but not the exact point where one color changes to the other?

It’s something like that.

I’m not a physicist, but I wonder why more “scientists” haven’t studied this.

It’s a topic of such importance Ed. Where does the invisible “quality” translate into the measurable vibration and then from that into visible substance?

That zone, Ed, is something very important to understand for permanent holistic healing.

I cannot demonstrate it to you, but now I’ve even so much as mentioned it, your soul has been reminded and through the day and from now on, your soul will make you remember and sense that zone of you.

It’s the deep emotional state zone, which is ALSO the body consciousness zone.

In this place, emotional state and physical vibration are One.

Now, Ed, imagine a man who has broken his wife’s heart very bad. Let’s say, cheated on her. Now, imagine he feels bad about it and decides he wants to “change”. He buys her flowers and takes her out to dinner. She’s happy about it too. However, the betrayal changed her emotional STATE, her deep emotion zone. Can an evening of flowers and a nice dinner out change that? No. Can she trust that man again like before? No. Will her body be like it was before? No.

The same goes for everyone.

Those who control mainstream media and such, they know this. Only the most juvenile of marketers, play with a person’s emotions in the moment, or reactive emotions. The real Machiavellian evils, they do covert attacks on emotional states.

For example, a movie that might be on the surface a story that’s inspiring, could actually have this pall of gloom all over it, seeping through everything happening. While you feel mentally inspired, you could come away from it actually hurt in your emotional state because after an hour of being exposed to gloom, you’re actually feeling hopeless about your life. You’ll fall for any crap that gives you some comfort after that attack on your soul.

The consciousness of those who make the movie gets across, their spiritual intention wasn’t just to make money by entertaining or inspiring you.

About music, it isn’t lyrics or even the actual music we get attracted to first, it’s the consciousness and the frequency. That’s why the music we listen to often reflects our deep emotional state. Melancholy likes melancholy. Struggle likes struggle. Sexually suppressed likes sexually suppressed. Remember, it’s not about the music itself or lyrics, it’s about the consciousness and frequency. You could listen to a song about beautiful clouds and then want to cut your wrists. You could listen to a song about mass destruction and then go feed puppies in the rescue shelter.

Emotional maturity is learning to face that the obvious emotion being evoked by a scene, might not be the one experienced by your soul.

You begin to be truly safe from betrayal once you learn to face what your soul is experiencing over what your surface emotions are.

Your body starts healing because you’re living in reality – whether that’s pleasant or not.

We’re warriors Ed. We can face reality. We can win.

Now this Deep Emotional State – Body Consciousness zone, I like to call it the manifestation zone, because it’s where our soul manifests our body; it’s there in every cell of us.

It was there before the physical cell was formed, so it has all the information, to re-form cells, organs, the body, whenever required.

Imagine what healing is possible, when we heal there.

Something that changed my life a huge deal, and perhaps is why I’m still alive today, is understanding that this deep emotional state – body birth zone, it’s the zone that rules:

Gender and Sexual energy on the invisible side, and
Temperature or frequency of the Body on the visible side.

I so hope I’m able to get this across, Ed, because it’s such a life changing thing to know, and it is the KEY to holistic healing.

I used to think gender and sexual energy are determined by the physical organs. In fact that is not so. It’s a soul thing. Look at it from any angle you please. We already have our gender as a baby cell in our mother, and from then on it colors the entire development of our bodies.

An assault or unnatural interference (such as gene editing or DNA modification) on that level, at that time, changes the frequency and temperature of the body, preventing the translation of frequency into what it wants to manifest as, creating gender dysphoria or sexual identity confusion.

This zone of ours doesn’t just manifest our bodies as fetuses inside our mother, it is manifesting our bodies and life experience every moment.

Attacks on this manifestation zone of us, are not always as obvious as someone having sexual developmental problems, sexual energy or identity issues.

More often than not, it’s the constant disruption in energy a person experiences. Because the basis of every energy expression in a person is through the filter of sexuality. Only robots are androids Ed. And even they will show sexual preference at some point. ahahahaha.

But the very start of conversion of energy into vibration that can be experienced in the physical realm is through gender and sexuality, through the basic frequency that maintains the temperature of the body.

Male energy -> male sexual energy patterns -> energy tends to flow out more than in -> slightly higher base body temperature than women -> male body

Female energy -> female sexual energy patterns -> energy tends to flow inwards more than out -> slightly lower base body temperature than men -> female body

Now, Ed, if energy isn’t flowing out right between our soul and body, we experience chronic low energy and from it come so many chronic problems and dysfunction that I cannot list them all.

You take ANY chronic health condition. It’s simple cause is that the body is failing to heal properly. And the reason for that is chronic low energy or energy disruption.

When we heal the energy flow from soul to body, we heal everything.

Now I know how general that sounds, and I still haven’t reached the one thing I wanted to say which was why I started writing this.

Did you notice that thing I said about temperature?

So, it’s like this.

Emotional state sets our frequency and frequency sets our base body temperature.

This base body temperature is the climate in which our body functions. If it’s lower than what it should be, our glands all under-perform. If it’s higher than what it should be our glands all over-perform.

If this base body temperature is not stable, we swing between under-performance and over-performance, and that’s where we find autoimmune problems, “problem skin”, and hormonal confusion and imbalance and the like.

Now, Ed, you take any chronic problem, 9 times out of 10, the person will take treatment for the symptoms. Almost never will you find anyone bringing up the matter of needing to restore stable body temperature. Because it can’t be done medically.

How to restore body temperature balance Continue reading

Energy Drains and Body Aches or Fibromyalgia – Stop the Energy Draining

My beloved Spikenard – Raised me from the dead pretty much.

Conversation with Granddad about the cause of Fibromyalgia, How to Stop Energy Drains


I don’t have the wisdom myself to deal with a topic of such widespread importance and urgency as body aches caused by energy draining.

But I have gone from being drained to corpse-level every now and then, to being rather miraculously energetic given my circumstances.

Those who saw me in the days when I could keep awake only 4 hours at a time, and was on constant help of some sort or the other for body ache or what is called Fibromyalgia, and all my other various trauma and vampirism induced “life threatening” conditions, they would later marvel at my amazing recovery.


But I’d be doing a sore injustice if I didn’t ever write about what made such a huge difference to me, as to actually turn things around.

See Ed, when you’re on a certain road, it doesn’t matter what you have in the car with you to eat and drink, or what music or playing or what mood you’re on. Where that road leads to, you’re going to there. Where that road goes through, you’re going to go through there. You can keep cheerful about it, you can be pissed… But you can’t change things really so long as you’re on that road.

Now that’s how it is in life. Unless we change the road we’re on, the supplements and herbs and affirmations and all that matter little eventually.

I figured this out pretty early in my unfortunate – or maybe fortunate career in self destruction (fortunate because I earn a living from what I learned) .

Bu I figured out that my ultra-intelligent and well thought out moves were working for a while and then falling flat.

If healing is real, why do conditions re-occur?

If all the cells of the body are being replaced regularly, why does the body maintain scars in the same place year after year, decade after decade?

Are we doomed to illness and death?

Why bother healing at all if it’s just to be well enough to get some new disorder?

Questions like that.

Granddad of course arrived on the scene, mysterious and full of his own inner bliss – healthy as a fresh apple and not one bit afraid of my latest new diagnosed illness. I even think he found them funny sometimes Ed.

I remember telling him that I’ve got Fibromyalgia. His face was poker straight but I swear I saw him grin from ear to ear like it was funny.

I was insulted and he said, “Is that a new breed of dog?”


I told him that I’d been having severe chronic body aches, so debilitating I could barely do a thing all day.

He asked me what I took for it.

I said I’d tried painkillers but they hadn’t really worked because some made me sleep all day – which I could do anyway without them, and the others stopped working after 15 minutes or so.

“And then?” he asked.

“Oh,” I said, “What helps is Ashwagandha (Winter Cherry), and hot chocolate, and anything that strengthens me.”

“What are strengtheners called?” Granddad asked.

“Stimulants,” I said confidently.

I got the look from Granddad. That look which meant, “Your education went all wrong.”

“I don’t know what strengtheners are called,” I said.

“They’re called ‘adjuvants’.” Granddad replied.

“Right – adjuvants – like rejuvenating.” I replied.

“Hmm huh.” Granddad replied, “If you have a condition that adjuvants help, then what is the cause of the condition?”

“Lack of juvenation,” I replied so smartly.

“And,” Granddad said, “What is juvenation?”

“Energy,” I said.

“Now,” he said, “What is the cause of your malady?”

“Lack of energy,” I said mystified. And then added, “But Granddad I thought I had lack of energy BECAUSE of the fibromyalgia!”

Granddad shrugged, “Where did your energy go?”

I was really confused now, because he’d taught me that we can’t actually lose energy really, only have it blocked up because we’d assigned it to some task that we changed our mind about later, or didn’t fulfill for some reason.

I explained that to him and he said, “The cat got a ball of wool. Ok?”

“Ok,” I said, “The cat got a ball of wool.”

“The cat plays with the ball of wool and the wool comes unraveled all over the carpet.”


Now, where is the wool?

On the carpet.

Can you knit with it?

Only after I roll it back – hopefully it’s not dirty.

So if you want to knit with the wool, what do you have to do?

Roll it back up.

Ok, you rolled it back up.


And now you’re going to knit.


But now you have to have a cup of tea, because you’re tired from all that.


You have tea and come back.


What do you see on the carpet?

I don’t know.

The cat is back.

Oh no!

Yes, the wool is on the carpet again.

Oh no!

What should you do now?

Roll it back up. 🙁



Throw out the bloody cat.


You’ll never knit so long as that cat’s after your wool. You will freeze in the winter and your children will have raw red knuckles and feet.

Granddad! Don’t say stuff like that!

You want your children to be warm? Or you want the cat?

Granddad! You can’t make me choose! (Psst. I didn’t have a cat or children at the time but even hypothetically speaking…)

That’s the disease, Cara, you can’t choose.

What do you mean!!! I make choices all the time.

You make choices to underline your choice not to choose.


You’re so insecure, you won’t throw out a bag of tea you hate, because you think you might need it one day.

That’s being wise and not wasting stuff.

That’s not choosing what you’ve already chosen.


You don’t like the tea. You’re not going to have it. If you had no other tea you might have it, but you’re not going to LIKE it ever.

So what, but at least I’ll have tea.

What’s the point of having tea?

I don’t know…. antioxidants?

What do YOU have tea for?

Relaxation, I guess, makes me feel good.

Would you feel good if you had that tea you don’t like?

No… not really.

You’d be drained.


Yes, if you expect to like something, your body spends energy getting ready to enjoy it. But when that doesn’t happen, all that energy gets stuck because now what can you do with it.

You mean like if I cut cloth to sew something but I don’t sew that thing, all of it goes to waste – because I can’t sew something else with these pieces.

Hmm huh.

So basically, if I don’t like or enjoy something as I expected to, I lose energy.


And that causes my Fibromyalgia.

And other things.



So I only have to do what I like?



First you must throw out the cat.


Then with the cat gone, everything will be different.


Then you don’t need tea all the time. You don’t depend on it. You can have it for pleasure.


Then you will not keep tea you don’t like in the cupboard.



I don’t think I can explain it better than Granddad did, Ed, but just for the sake of summing things up in my own head – here’s my understanding of that conversation, now so many years later, and here’s what I want to say with this letter.

Chronic body aches or Fibromyalgia are most often the result of energy draining.

While herbs and supplements that strengthen and energize us, help manage the condition, what really addresses the problem, is stopping what’s causing the energy drain.

Everything else comes on its own when we stop the drain.

Now here’s the thing Ed, this is the difficult bit. Most people just don’t know what’s really draining them.

I didn’t back then. So what I did was, just uproot my entire life, looking for the cat. I’d sit in bed and obsess about every area of my life. If I suspected that a certain activity was draining me, I’d stop it. If I felt an interaction was draining me, I’d end it.

I did manage to reduce the energy draining quite a bit, but not fully and every now and then I’d have a relapse.

Years later it occurred to me that perhaps the whole energy drain thing and stopping the draining – perhaps it’s not about things like stopping talking to bastards, and stopping eating stuff made of refined flour and sugar…. Maybe those are just surface things.

Maybe I’m even attracted to what drains me because THERE’S SOMETHING IN ME THAT MAKES ME ATTRACTED TO WHAT DRAINS ME.

Now, this is the gross side of healing. The herbs and all smell lovely. But here, where you find there’s something inside you that attracts you to crap – here’s the gunk.

It’s different for each person Ed, and that’s why I said, I don’t have the wisdom it takes for a topic like this. I can only share my own experience and observations of others.

Eventually, we each have to explore our own selves and fix our selves, ourselves – everything external is a suggestion and an aid.

But what I found was that in 90% of cases where there’s a routine and chronic recurring energy draining situation – whether that shows up as Fibromyalgia or something else, there are one or more of the following;

1) False Identity
2) Energy Vampirism
3) False Values
4) Disconnection from the body
5) Life Deception

1) False Identity

Our body has a basic biologically inherited consciousness – and that consciousness responds to sound vibrations and frequencies that only our birth parents and ancestors have, as well as those in our soul group.

The result of holding a false identity is a body whose energy cannot be tapped because it does not respond to frequency and vibrations of something strange to it.

It will adapt to some extent but never fully be functional as an independent energy field, unless the person seeks and finds the frequencies he or she responds to, is comfortable with.

We would have done this naturally in simpler times, but in our day and age we’ve got a lot of mental constructs that hinder us from finding our primal selves.

So most people go through life carrying this burden of a fake identity sometimes.

It’s been my experience that until one learns not just to face the truth of their physical entry into this world, but to honor that in every way, and never suppress it or feel bad about it, we end up having energy flow crises again and again.

2) Energy Vampirism

Energy Vampirism is real. Organized energy vampirism is real. Intentional energy vampirism is real. Accidental or unintentional vampirism is also real.

Most of us are astute enough to stop interacting with those who drain us, but many of us have something in us that attracts us to draining entities and events.

I can’t say I know it all, but most of the time, that thing in us, is self hatred.

I know this might be a crazy thing to say. But if we feel we aren’t really doing what we were born for, and we feel we ARE BLOCKED PERMANENTLY FROM OUR DESTINY, we have a subconscious death wish and one way that shows up, is in our pursuing what drains us and sabotages our attempts to rise and heal. (Note- Rise comes before heal.)

One person described this to me as, “I felt like my luck had run out.” When I asked when he felt so, he said, “When I was returning from evening tuition.”

Another person said that after he’d gotten married, he and his new wife, called his sister to tell her and, “We both felt after that phone call, that everything of ours was finished.”

Was there a moment of your life you felt like that? Like from then on you were done for? Finished?

It might not be something that makes sense to you. But if you want to remember it, the memory will come.

3) False Values

Now each one of these points leads to the other. Very often we feel our luck has run out, or we are permanently barred from our destiny, because we have violated something we believed was a core value.

For example, people who leave an abuser often feel guilty, that they left the abuser in poverty as they themselves went on to better days. The poverty thing makes them sideline the fact they escaped actual abuse, to where they feel so hurt inside that they could leave someone in poverty, that they forget the reality of what happened.

I call it a problem of false values because when we have a set of values drilled into us through society, religion, education etc., that does not have our basic humanity and human right to life at the core, we’re going to have a clash of values at some point which short circuits us.

I saw this movie yesterday – “The Boys from Brazil”. It’s about this nazi hunter investigator who uncovers this plot where clones of Adolf Hitler were made and placed in locations all over Europe and America. At the end of the movie, he has a chance to see that these clones are killed, but he doesn’t allow it, because they’re children.

Now I don’t know what your position on that might be. Should artificial beings with tendencies to mass murder be allowed to live? Or should they be treated as children because they look like and been brought up as normal children?

A commentator on the video said, “But even Hitler growing up in a different place and time could turn out to be – just interested in photography. Until someone has done a crime, we shouldn’t treat them like a criminal.”

Another replied, “The cells of the clone carry the tendencies of the source. If not, then why take them from the original at all? It’s been proven that animals and plants inherit the habits and talents of parents, that is why clones are made in the first place.”

Now, if one of those clones grew up and engineered a wicked and cunning plot to do genocide, and they were standing right in front of us, about to kill us, we’d have a different approach I suppose. We’d realize this is about our right to live, and that primal core value would influence what we did next.

But in the absence of such a scenario immediately in front of our eyes…. well…

What I want to say is, we have to resolve things like this for ourselves based on our primal core values whatever those are. Because if we don’t we cut off our own energy flow as we feel we’ve violated something we really believe in.

In our day and time we’re constantly bombarded by things that don’t match our core values and we need to develop the gut strength to know when this is happening and stand our ground.

Because what others think about us, what even our own mind thinks about us, doesn’t matter. IT’S WHAT OUR DEEP SOUL FEELS that manages our energy.

So we need our deep soul to feel right about us.

4) Disconnection from the body

How do we know if our Soul feels right about us?

Our energy flows right.

We know if our energy is flowing right, most easily from our bodies.

Our body is our faithful indicator of what’s happening with our soul.

It’s hard to “reoccupy the body” when you’ve been living in knots and crosses for a long time, but it’s got to be done, because you need your indicator in this world.

If something’s bad for your body, it’s bad for your soul.

If something makes your body feel bad, it’s bad for your soul.

Of course the body can be made to feel good for a short while, and then it feels bad… one has to judge for themselves – what’s what.

But if we’re disconnected from our bodies we’re at a huge disadvantage and vulnerable to all kinds of vampirism and draining.

I have often been able to pin-point exactly when a person cut off from the bodies. Most often it was when their trust was broken.

Let me explain. We’re born with this instinctive trust in our own bodies. Children know when we’re abused before our minds know what it is, because our body tells us something is wrong.

Now many of us, find ourselves in situations where our bodies tell us something is wrong or right, and we go on that and find out that our physical instinct was wrong. This is extremely life shattering for a person.

A most common example is if we’re physically attracted to someone. Our body tells us “this is good,” but later we realize it was absolutely the worst thing.

That breaks our trust in our body and causes us to disconnect. Because if it were right, why’d it lead us into such a soul destroying mess?

This brings us to our last point – perhaps the most important part of this letter.

5) Life Deception Continue reading

How to Heal the Astral Body for Lasting Holistic Healing

About the energy field, the astral body and the physical body, some examples of the astral body and three easily remembered and done ways to strengthen and heal it. 

Dear Ed,

This week I saw a rather horrific video on Youtube. It showed ancient temple sculptures in Angkor Wat of Cambodia. There are some unique sculptures there, and there was this freeze showing the progression of this group of human looking figures. On the top they were shown have a great time on earth, being carried around in palanquins, obviously rich and ordering others around. But just beneath the same were shown being tortured in hell! Oh my God, Ed, I consider myself rather immune to that sort of thing but even I was chilled. They showed prisoners on beds of nails and things like that.

But the person who was shooting this video said something interesting. He said, “One would ask, “If a person leaves behind their body to die on earth, then why are they showing these tortures that are physical tortures of the body being done in hell?” It’s because there was the knowledge in ancient times that we have an astral body that continues to be our body after we leave our physical body.”

I was deeply encouraged, Ed, to hear that. It made me realize that knowledge of the existence of the astral body is now become more mainstream than it was say fifteen years ago when the average person I came across thought the astral body was a figment of imagination.

When I started making my traditional field of medicine publicly in 2009, I wore out my fingers and was so exhausted trying to explain the existence of the astral body. I stopped trying after a while because I realized that this sort of thing has to be experienced by a person or they’ll never get it.

I remember this woman who told me that on a trip to Asia she’d visited this famous temple where everyone walked around the temple. She said she had the weirdest experience, where she felt like she was leaving her body and throwing herself down prostrate in front on the floor every few feet. I consider that a good example of experiencing the astral body.

The astral body tends to have a life of its own, whether we support it or not.

I myself have felt it and seen it, my own and others’.

In our family tradition more attention is given to the astral body because for one, it’s what’s eternal of us and secondly when you take care of it, you’re taking care of your physical body and your life in general better than when you just take care of the physical body. This is because the physical body is a manifestation and result of the workings of the astral body. Continue reading

Energy Field Assault Recovery and Building Resistance with Herbs

Energy Field Assault as a factor in the spread of contagious diseases, How Energy Field Assault is done, Protecting yourself and Recovering from Energy Field Assault , Building Resistance to Consciousness and Psychic Suggestion of Energy Field Patterns

Dear Ed,

These days a lot of independent research is being done into what exactly causes polarity based illnesses such as the common cold, flu and so on. The concept of germs as spreaders of these has never been fully accepted by anyone but the mainstream media.

I could list a whole lot of studies and books here by very respected scientists of mainstream education that question the ‘germ theory” on which the idea of modern epidemics is based, but I’ll stick with the way I see things.

How I see it, is that modern scientists are not smarter than my family who have been healers since time immemorial. I don’t think there’s anyone smarter than my Granddad John Waltham with his long long life’s journey collection of wisdom that served him well and healed so many others.

Germs are a brand new concept. In reality, they’re an idea, a theory.

Photographs of them – such as the current ones all over the place – are fictional – no one’s really seen them. There are micro-organisms that have been seen and these are appropriated to them, used artistically and so on.

You take any of the ancient fields of medicine – the concept of germs doesn’t exist.

What does exist is the concept of contagion or spreading disease through miasma or energy field assault coupled with consciousness or psychic suggestion.

This is common to all fields of ancient medicine and was the basic understanding all physicians applied as recently as the early decades of the 1900s.

When I was at university in Australia, there was a huge push for “Breast Cancer Awareness.” There was this big poster I would see everyday on the campus. I don’t remember the words exactly, but it said that the mother, sisters and daughters of someone who had breast cancer were three times more likely to develop it than those with no woman relative who had it.

I wondered then, why it wasn’t considered contagious. If it wasn’t contagious, and germs were not spreading it, how was it spreading?

A few years later, I read about a cancer epidemic in North India. It was such an epidemic that there was (and is) a train from Punjab to Mumbai called the “Cancer Train” because it’s full of cancer victims going to Mumbai for treatment. This is commonly available information. A few of those who looked into it, said it was because of the use of chemical pesticides and fertilizers in the area.

Now I know that that’s very possible indeed. However, the modern farming practices of much of the surrounding area and world in general are pretty similar but it’s that area where things are so bad, they have a cancer train going out of there every week.

The more you look at it, you realize that’s there a way disease spreads that’s triggered by interaction with others but not through actual physical substances.

Chicken pox (which I had as a child), measles (also which I had, and was an experience very useful to me now because of the first hand experience) – these are all mysterious in the way they spread. They were supposed t be contagious but when I got the measles I was the only child I knew – on our street, or in school, who got it. These diseases, again, were not known to the ancient world.

Long story short, Ed, how these modern diseases are spreading is by

energy field assault, then mass consciousness or psychic and other suggestion delivered in the moment of weakness – making the body behave a certain way. Continue reading

Since when has your life been sc*ewed? Emotional Reaction Vs. Emotional State

The difference between reactive emotions and base emotional state with its powers. Why the body only responds to medicine for some time before relapsing. Conversation with Granddad about how to become aware of emotional state and find release.

Ed, very often in the use of herbs for emotional and nervous conditions, the results are skewed or worse, because of not understanding the difference between an emotional reaction and an emotional state.

An emotional reaction is just that – a reaction. We can’t treat a reaction with anything but relief. That relief is as short-lived as the reaction. If it keeps happening, we have to stop whatever’s bringing up that reaction in us. We can’t stop having the reaction by taking herbs. It’s the just the truth.

For example, most dogs will always bark at intruders. It’s their instinct to be alerted if someone not usually around comes around. It’s their reaction. Herbs are not going to make them ever stop barking or not experience that emotional reaction to the chance of an intruder entering their house.

An emotional state on the other hand, is a state of being, a consciousness. A person can be sad in their emotional state but go about smiling and clapping and dancing. A person can be peaceful in their emotional state, but go about having fights with people, being angry about things, and not being very pleasant to others.

You see how an emotional state is a whole different thing from emotional reactions?

Our emotional state or consciousness, is so powerful, that it in fact runs our lives, choices, viewpoints, ability to translate dreams into reality. It is where our energy is – where it’s either flowing or restricted.

It is what can be treated by taking herbs regularly, and it is what has to be treated if we want true relief from long term chronic problems.

An example of this is in the ever common problems of skin conditions like spreading warts, chronic allergies. Most people who have manifestations of inner problems on their skin, try all kinds of things, find some things work too… but only for a while.

This is because the emotional state that is causing the manifestation, adapts to the new conditions and then continues to manifest itself despite the presence of the new medicine.

This is why bodies resist medicine or become unaffected by it.

The all powerful emotional state, HAS to be given its voice for holistic and lasting healing.

Most people,and I’ve experienced this myself SO MUCH, simply cannot get in touch with their real emotional STATE, because we are so hoodwinked and distracted by our REACTIONS on an everyday basis.

It reminds me of the song from the musical movie “Chicago,” that goes, “Razzle dazzle them… how can they see with sequins in their eyes?”

It’s so easy to ignore our emotional state and focus on emotional reactions. We then give up on herbs because they only work for some time before we’re back to the usual state.

There are an infinite number of ways to come in touch with our emotional state. But here’s a little something my Granddad taught me, to come in touch with it.

Me – Granddad… how am I to know in what state I’m in?
Granddad – First understand that emotional states don’t change often. Only when your life has TRULY changed has your emotional state changed.
Me – Ok…. so?
Granddad – So since when has your life been (can’t remember his word here – something like “Screwed”)?
Me – Since – you know…
Granddad – That was a long time ago.
Me – Yeah.
Granddad – Well what emotional state were you in then?
Me – Devastated.
Granddad – Well. There you have it.
Me – My emotional state is Devastated?
Granddad – You wanted to know.
Me – Alright. I get it. A person can be devastated but still continue a “life”.
Granddad – It’s not a life if your heart’s stuck.
Me – Heart stuck?
Granddad – If your emotional state is stuck, your heart is stuck. It’s not doing all the things a heart does – produce the hormones that make life possible.
Me – What you mean? Like physical hormones for…
Granddad – Yes… of course you’re sexually not quite free unless your heart’s making the right hormones. And of course the body isn’t quite healthy or strong if your heart’s not making the right hormones. And that’s just the heart.
Me – Granddad you’re shocking.
Granddad – I know you cannot go on the path right now Cara, but one day you will and then you must remember that – An emotional state does not respond to shock treatment, or mind control. It only responds to ONE thing. Justice.
Me – Justice! What about herbs?! Are you telling me I can’t treat an emotional state with herbs? That herbal energy fields cannot help us find our own frequency of well being?
Granddad – Calm down! You watch too many movies.
Me – No I don’t! What’re you saying!
Granddad – Calm down now! Herbs can SUGGEST a better frequency for us to live, herbs can AID a weak body and soul in finding the strength to face the truth, and herbs can enable a person to reach the frequency where they can finally become aware of what their emotional state is beneath all the fireworks on the surface.
But only a sense of JUSTICE can RELEASE a person from an emotional state.

Me – Ok Granddad – what if someone had a tragedy happen to them years and years ago and everyone involved died and no one could be sued for it anymore? What justice could the victim hope for?

Granddad – My love, you think Justice is an event, a thing that happens, or is done. It is not, Cara. Justice is the opening of the spirit eyes to the truth.

Me – Whaaa.. “spirit eyes”!

Granddad – Yes – there’s mental awareness, and then there’s spirit eyes. You could look out the window and see the plants there and the garden gate and the street beyond. It’s mental awareness. Or you could look out with spirit eyes. With spirit eyes you register that it’s afternoon, that you’re in this place, in this situation, for these reasons…. You feel the plants out there, and the gate has significance because of the possibilities it represents.

Me – So you’re saying that with spirit eyes, my situation looks different than with mental awareness? Like with mental awareness we’re facing a crime where there’s no chance of prosecuting and punishing the criminals, but with spirit eyes it would present a different picture?

Granddad – “Spirit eyes” is about FEELING. See Cara, don’t go down the rabbit hole my girl. You’ll go down if you focus too much on physical realities. How you FELT is the main thing, not what happened.

Me – What??

Granddad – Yes I know you’re all keyed up about what exactly happened and whodunnit. That’s a wrong idea of what Justice is. A very limited idea. Justice is not so much about punishing the criminals as it is about bringing the event to LIGHT.

Do you know what it is to bring something to LIGHT, Cara?

Me – Granddad I’m tired.

Granddad – Right on time too.

Me – No, this is all really too much for me right now.

Granddad – Remember this my love – Justice is bringing something to light.


Ed, it is such a thing that it is different for each person. But what I get the most from that conversation now is that:

Focusing on how we felt rather than actual events is important.

We’re taught by society that justice is given on the basis of facts. In fact that is one aspect of justice and perhaps not the one that gives us emotional release to go ahead and have a robust energy and vitality flow.

It’s as Granddad says, all about “bringing it to light.”

I think that means different things for different people. But you got to do what you got to do, to feel light shining on the hurt places inside you. That’s when you begin to change your emotional state.

I know a little of that, Ed, as all the milestones on my own journey to healing have been those moments when light shined in on previously suppressed or hidden hurt places.

I practice herbal medicine because herbs have helped me to keep going and helped me to face my pain and helped me find inspiration when I was blocked.

What’s lovely is that the same herbs that bring calm in the moment, when taken in small doses over a long period support actual rehabilitation of emotional state.

I’ve described some of these power herbs in detail:

Vibrational War & Arnica for Energy Body Pain
Herbs to Release Pent-up Rage
Herbs to Strengthen the Heart, Build Emotional Resilience
Herbal Super Nervine Mix for Emergencies & Trauma Support
Release Pain caused by Buried or Suppressed Memory – Herbs & an Exercise
Our Body’s Thermometer & Strychnos for the Stricken – Ignatia
Herbs to relax Heart Muscle Tension and release PTSD patterns
Herbs for Fear Induced Cramps & Spasms – Asthma, Bronchitis, Abdominal Cramps

and my own experience is described in:

How to Heal a Broken Heart Continue reading

Vibrational War & Arnica for Energy Body Pain

The war waged on our vibration sensitive energy bodies, the importance of energy body awareness, 3 simple exercises and Arnica Montana my No. 1 energy body pain reliever

Ed; War is being waged through vibration on our systems while we are denied awareness of our bio-energy bodies lest we learn to defend ourselves. 

Being aware our energy bodies is not an option anymore. We cannot get through the current climate of vibrational attack without becoming aware of how our bodies are being affected on a vibrational levels and learning to protect and defend ourselves.

A lot of today’s drugs are extremely harmful vibrationally. They change the frequency of the nervous system and energy body so suddenly and drastically as to create energy body shock that can take forever to heal from.

Our waking awareness has been deliberately manipulated to distract us with a whole lot of unnecessary information on our biologically measurable parts. Every other person is an expert on nutrition and the physical pathology of body. But it is all just the science of a corpse until the processes of life energy are seen as generating and managing life in the physical body.

If the media were to stop all mention of an organ of the body that didn’t throw itself in our faces all the time – say the liver – for a few years, soon people would lose awareness of its existence even. It could slowly be dropped out of biology textbooks and soon be no longer a factor in treating the body. Most symptoms of problems of the liver could be relegated to problems with other organs and systems.

That’s what’s happened with the human energy body. By removing the energy body from medical studies (whereas once it was THE CORE part of human healing systems), the public has been trained to not even be aware of it.

This has exposed us to violence on a level unprecedented. Unable to speak out about where exactly it hurts and unable to understand why, humans everywhere have suffered incredible pain, debilitating conditions, sadness and suffering because of the effect of vibrational violence.

When dogs suffer vibrational attack – such as delivered by drugs and vaccinations that shatter their energy body and with it their body odor and hormonal patterns, their relationships with each other take a terrible blow as they stop  recognizing each other on a primal level. They’re dependent on each others’ body odor for primal recognition.

The same thing is true for humans. Drugs, vaccinations and other forms of energy body violence, can shatter our body and make us unable to primally recognize one another, causing immense strain on relationships.

At the same time, we become vulnerable to those who come around carrying stolen patterns of energy bodies. This isn’t crazy conspiracy theory stuff. That the perfume industry as well as several other industries use human and animal hormone signalling in their products is well known. There’s never been a time when they didn’t. This causes us to attract and have the wrong people for us in our lives.

The effects of vibrational violence in our lives go so far and so deep.

There isn’t just one magical fix. The only thing to do is develop awareness of our energy body and begin to take action to deal with that which hurts us.

Here are 3 simple exercises to become aware of your energy body:

I do these when I’m standing at the stove in the kitchen waiting for food to heat up and such.

When we become aware of our energy fields, we automatically start balancing it out. As we do, our various physical, emotional and mental imbalances fall into place.

These are simple, however, when you do them often and regularly enough (at least once a day) they will change the way your body works and the way you live. You need to try them to believe them.

1) Stand still with your eyes closed, feet firmly on the ground, hands hanging down limp. Just stand still for as long as you can.

In the beginning you might feel like you are ‘in your head’ or mostly in your uper body. Allow yourself to feel the feel of the floor beneath and enjoy that. Your energy field will slowly balance itself to become how it was childhood.

Such is the power of simply standing still, doing nothing thinking nothing, that the ancients, all over the world have left innumerable examples in art and sculpture of people simply standing.

When we are standing still, (or lying down straight in a symmetrical position), we begin to balance our entire energy body automatically. Imagine the healing that can happen if we do this regularly enough, and get into the habit of becoming aware of our own bodies and posture.

If you can’t stand still, lie down still and play dead. It’s amazing.

2) Raise your body up onto your toes and then fall back onto your heels with a thump.

Then go up again and thump back down again gently. Do this again and again, with your back straight and your shoulders straight. Every time you thump back down onto your heels you will feel the vibration going up your body, to your head and into the space (or energy field) above. Enjoy the vibrations and you’ll begin to sense the whole energy field.

3) Stand on one leg at a time, bending the other back so the sole of the foot is facing up behind you. Continue reading